Indian wedding: Wedding ceremony

I am back to life after a nap as there is a major rush going on around: a beautician came to prepare Neelima for tonight and many women have started helping out and getting dressed themselves too. It’s somewhat interesting that even though all the aunts, their children and many more were all staying in different rooms, most of them would get to ours (where Neelima, the bride) was staying - to get ready. And then all there mass preparations would turn an ultimate female rule. Meters of sarees and kilos of lehengas are stretched out, women are running around in blouses and petticoats (I recalled “Gone with the Wind”, scene with the gathering in “12 oaks” when during the nap ladies were roaming around in the underwear – blouses and long skirts). Some kids who got dressed first are running around too.



Huge boxes with numerous amount of bangles making up for long-long tubes: collecting bangle-sets for particular dresses has started. Golden wristlets, chains, rings: intricate ornaments with peacocks - precious and semi-precious stones – all that is put on as a rich seasoning on a summer salad by a generous hand. Elegant make-up with almost obligatory eye-underline and plain hairstyle are also at place. This is the ultimate women’s habitat where they indulge the mysterious rituals to celebrate their beauty. The outcome is astonishing.





I am over-excited as I’m wearing sari tonight – my first time in life! With the help of some women it’s on as it should be – pleats in front, palu folding on the left shoulder. Matching jewellery, make up, bindi, no glasses and a bit sleek hair (as strongly recommended by the women).





I know it’s a bit (ok, just a bit?) selfish to describe how you yourself looked while there were hundreds of other amazingly dressed women not mentioning the bride who just seemed to be made of gold and gems – so amazingly much of those there were on her dress. But still … it was my first time in saree… .. Gazes started in the hotel itself when we were getting in the car.



Milli and Asheen were looking at me with a great interest, busily checked out how my mehindi came out and Asheen concluded that I looked just like an Indian girl.

We are arriving to the place and getting into the hall where the wedding ceremony takes place. Hundreds of people are there,



the groom is already awaiting on the stage, the bride is accompanied by an impressive crowd of close relatives. Neelima’s mamajies pass over their beloved niece to the groom. And mamajies were truly a highlight that night – kings of Vizag as they called themselves - looking really awesome in their costumes.

Neelima’s mother asks Nivanthee and me to take care of the reception.



So, we stay at the entrance to greet the guests with roses.





Mamajies and 2 Neelima’s brothers are right here too - they would put their hands in front of the chest and bow a bit to the coming guests. Namaste!



Needless to say some of the guests were captivated by mamajies’ looks that they did not even notice us handing in roses.

However, the comments on my look have started arriving and here the male logics comes ;o) I remember one of those Cosmo-experiments in Russian Cosmopolitan when men were to choose a girl they looked most from the given pairs. The outcome of the experiment proved that men are very insensitive when it comes to upscale designer clothing and amount of effort put into looking great – men have got some other consideration to pick out a girl. My point here is however plain my saree was in comparison with other really luxurious, outstanding and proper weeding sarees I bet I’ve got much more compliments and admiring looks that any other women (but the bride of course, I’ve got some delusion of grandeur, but not to that extent). On the first place, it appeared that people did not really expect me to wear saree for the wedding. When on the first day Neelima, Nivanthee and me were discussing that my blouse for saree was too tightly stitched and I brought it to show… all the women in the family raised their brows and the grandmother personally made sure that tailor would fix it and bring it back on time. So, the effect of unexpected came into play. Men kept telling me about my gorgeous, beautiful, amazing look - those who knew me - otherwise I could read pretty much the same messages from the eyes of the other guest without much translation needed. Many women praised me on the look too.

After receiving the guests we got to stand on the stage right behind the bride and the groom- right at the spot.





So, we’ll show up at all the pictures – official and unofficial ones, I also took a chance to take some more of mine.







Some interesting observations regarding wedding ceremony that was conducted according to Hindu traditions in Andhra Pradesh.





Guests (married couples) come up to greet the bride and the bridegroom with the presents along with turmeric, rice, kumkum. They get coconut and bananas on beetle leaves back: men accepts them and women takes it with palu of her saree.

Bride’s parents put bichua (toe ring) on the toes of the groom and one ring on his fingers. Extremely heavy flower garlands are put on both bride and groom. And it is not just one of those that is to be put on.



Among the rest, the newly married couple plays some games. Say, each of them gives a ring – silver and golden - which are put in the jar with water. However catches the golden one would be the ruling party in the house. The game is repeated several times and then bride plays the same with the sister-in-law. The game might be meant for reducing the tension related to the long monotonous procedures which are plenty during the wedding. With the same prize at stake (dominance in the family) they play with a huge round plate full of raw rice. In turns they take handfuls of rice and pour it over each other’s heads. The one who takes the last handful wins.



Neelima, a smart girl, tries to seize the plate itself with the remaining of rice, so that to be the last for sure. Chandu catches the plate, so the rice ends up on Neelima’s head. Not only idea, but also implementation counts.

Later on another interesting ritual is carried out: brother of the bride washes foot of the groom and he can request any amount of money for that. He will keep washing until he gets the money. This is somewhat akin to Russian weddings as there is also a number of activities called ransom when groom is to perform various tricky tasks before he even gets to see the bride on the wedding day itself.

Swamiji blesses the couple and a number of rituals is performed under his direct guidance.

Rituals are followed by a serious of family pictures: as far as the family is big it seems never ending for the poor couple.



While mane of the guest have already enjoyed the food and left they are still there scattered by tons of turmeric rice, bowing to the coming guests inclined by the heavy garlands and then sitting on the thrones smiling for the pictures… Probably, all this is meant for them not to think that one can get married just like that: the decision brings far stretching and not always rosy and pinky consequences. Implications he!